This winter season, while we’re anticipating a windy tea party in DC, many of us will also be preparing for below average temperatures in ¾ of the country.  

Guys, good luck stuffing long johns underneath those extra skinny jeans.  Something tells me you’re either going to have to stay away from Thanksgiving pie or go buy not so skinny ones, a rarity now a days.  As for those plunging v-necks, well as sexy as that chest hair might be, maybe those sweaters weren’t meant for you after all.  Instead, check out American Eagle’s sale on outerwear and flannel to keep those pecs nice and hot while earning kickbucks. Macy’s is also having a sale on Columbia fleeces and a Calvin Klein jacket that will be sure to keep you from shivering.

Women, good luck with those over-the-knee boots.  They not only take 30 minutes to lace up, they also leave you in a quandary as to what to do with those last three inches of exposed skin.  As for up top, those cowl necks really do kind of make you look like you’re drowning in yards of your grandmother’s knitting.  Not to mention most men don’t know what to make of all that extra-unneeded fabric.  Except that maybe it was meant to hide a neck brace or something like that.  Try Macy’s sale for Charter Club cashmere sweaters (oh so soft) and earmuffs galore that will not only keep you warm but will also help you gear up for more rewards as you bring in the kickbucks!

The sales are everywhere so get out to one of your Simon Malls and get bundled up before you’re stuck inside with nothing to bundle up in!